I started writing this blog to share my experiences with diabetes, to share the company I had started, Meal Mommy, and to share my life in general. I love to write. I find it very therapeutic. I find it to be an outlet. I find that I like to be honest and raw. I don't like the fluff...it's not for me. I am who I am and I am not ashamed of it. I wear my feelings on my sleeve and I wear them proudly. As I have said before, I am an open book and what you see is what you get. But this blog has turned out to be a little more intimate than I had expected and I honestly didn't think a soul was reading it. I thought the only people that might even click on it were friends in the DOC. And I have gotten so much support from them, it's unreal. And nothing has ever been said in here that has not been shared with my loved ones.
Over the last month or so I have gotten countless emails from old friends to friends that I have yet to meet, all being supportive and somehow relating to something that I have written. It has been both wonderful and inspiring to hear from these people. Most appreciate the honesty. Some think I am too honest and that I share too much information for the world to see. I don't share every thought, I promise you. MANY thoughts are left for me and me alone. Many memories are sacred. To me, this is a general idea of what I am going through and how I am feeling.
I don't know what kind of perception people are getting from me...strong or weak, rational or irrational, level-headed or head in the clouds, stable or unstable. Well, let me clarify...I am strong, I am rational, my head is firmly on my shoulders where it always remains to be and I am probably the most stable person you will ever come across. I am certain of who I am and what I stand for. I am certain of the choices I am making and I am making them with my family's best interests at heart. I am not afraid to be alone or to do things on my own. I do not need anyone to take care of me financially or otherwise. I will remain to be optimistic and positive and I will remain to give love a chance...at whatever point in my life I am in. I am a very well-educated, ambitious, intelligent, and independent woman...who can think for herself. What I write on here are merely obstacles I am facing in my life that I have chosen to share. They are ways that I wish to grow as a person in general. That's all.
With all of that said, I have left myself open to be judged by my candidness. And that is never fun. So, I think I am going to tone down the blog in the New Year...and if you are uncomfortable reading about my thoughts...don't read them.
Speaking of New Year's, I plan on spending New Year's Eve with my beautiful sister at the neighborhood bar listening to the drag queens sing Karaoke. Now there is NOTHING vanilla about that! Happy New Year!
My Resolutions for 2011
1. Have more "floor time" with the girls
2. Learn to go at a slower pace
3. Get back to my healthier eating habits
4. Get Lily's numbers back on track
5. Get my ass back in the gym...was always a passion and never a chore