I spent the majority of today watching Lily...and thanking God for every second that I have with her. Every precious second that she blinks, or laughs, or cries, or takes a tiny breath. Sometimes this is all too much. It doesn't seem like too much to the average eye. And it shouldn't. It is not their responsibility. It's not their flesh, their blood, their sole reason for being alive. I don't want sympathy for my daughter or for myself. Anyone can die. At any time. And every parent does their absolute best to protect their children. Life is not always as we plan for it. I learned that with our diagnosis. But we take on what is given to us and we give it the very best fight we've got inside of us. And we teach our children to fight and love and be thankful and live every day to the fullest. We teach them that they cannot live in fear of the unknown. If you do...life will pass you by very quickly. It's out of our hands...our fate. I am not a religious person and never have been, but I do know that we cannot control all that happens. Life happens and there are too many factors. My heart feels like a weight today that I have been dragging around...sometimes stopping and trying my hardest to get it off the ground. And sometimes just stopping to rest to take a breath and realize how heavy I feel. I have not stopped thinking about the family that lost their daughter for one second. I have been dealing with my life...living my life...checking my daughter...doing every day things...and not one second has this family left my mind. And they never will leave my mind. We are all a family. And thank God for that.
My thoughts and prayers and love and heartache go out to you all.