Friday, May 13, 2011

D-Blog Week Day Four- My Wildcard

Today's topic was "10 Things I Hate About Diabetes." Well. Here's the thing...there are a lot of things I can list that I don't like about diabetes but I have chosen not to. I have spent the last couple of months in a funk. I have had some very raw emotions while I am finally, almost four years later, working through my thoughts on this disease and how it has affected my little girl. I can't keep focusing on such negative things. I am in a good place right now. Things are looking up. I feel healthy, happy, and strong! I have two beautiful, sweet, loving, healthy (yes, I said that) little girls and the love of my life. Plus, a wonderful family and friends. I want to focus on that.

So, today I want to send out an apology. I had dinner with two newly diagnosed families that I met out here a couple of weeks ago. We went to the golf club so the kids could play in the grassy area out back along the water. It should have been a fun, peaceful evening. I had just been laid off and was a total grumpy ass. We started talking about night checks, etc. and I started telling horror stories. Yes, I was that mom. The one that when you tell someone you're pregnant, they tell you all the people they know that have miscarried. That was me. That is not usually who I am. At all. I even ventured out to tell them all about Dead in Bed. I am sure I scared them to death.

Here's where I get all fuzzy. I started my blog to both raise awareness and have a safe place to work through my feelings with diabetes. I have met the most wonderful fellow bloggers as well. So, I do believe in educating and making people aware this stuff does happen and you can't ever "lighten up" when it comes to diabetes. It doesn't so why should you? On the same note, being that I read up on this disease like crazy and I do blog, I am privy to hearing all about those that have lost loved ones or been through horrific events with diabetes. So, does that make me more in tuned to what can happen or make me more paranoid? Would I turn a blind eye to the complications like many do if I didn't read so much? Who knows...

All I know is that I am sorry to the two ladies that I had dinner with. I am sorry I was a Debbie Downer that night. And I am sorry if I scared the crap out of you! I am going to stick to my own diabetes care from now on and let the rest of the world stick to theirs. Afterall, as I say frequently, every child is totally different and that doesn't change with diabetes!


  1. I am sure you were a comfort to these ladies Kim! Don't be so hard on yourself.

    I have wondered about the same thing...if being so "plugged in" to the D' World if we are not more aware of the bad...however, I am also more aware of success stories. I think it is balanced out for me. I have not become more paranoid.

    I do think the world needs to know that this disease is serious and with that comes morbidity and mortality. If we "sugar-coat" it then how can we expect people to donate monies for research and a cure. I think the education and story sharing should be done responsibly (yes, this coming from the "Tampon" girl)

    Love ya!

  2. I am sure your apology will go a long way with them, but I bet you weren't as bad as you thought. I bet just being there for them was a help. I bet you offered support and comfort without realizing it.

  3. This must have been a hard letter to write, but I so admire the fact that you did. Diabetes is hard, life is hard, and we can't all be perfect all of the time. I'm sure those two mothers understand - if not now, then some day.